As a child I hated routine. I was one of the kids who got really excited by a fire drill; I would change my “style” often and in a dramatic way; I would remind my mother that the monthly cycle of recipes was redundant. I am so happy that school is back in session, I am back at work, and the kids are back at “school”. After five days of being literally snowed under, I was losing all sanity. I am still trying to regain the patience that I lost while stuck in the house without a physical outlet that didn’t involve my children. Sledding would have been great had I a chance to do it for five minutes by myself. It got pretty bad. I actually shoveled the driveway to get out some energy.
So here’s what I have solidified about myself:
I need employment outside of the home. I have utmost respect for moms who stay at home with their children. I find that I am a much better mother and person when I have something outside of my babies on which to focus. I see these moms at the park during the summer who are all fresh faced and happy, chatting it up with the other moms, and I am a bit jealous. I wish that I could be happy focusing all of my attention on my family and home. Maybe I am selfish.
The second thing that I have solidified in my self-knowledge is that I absolutely need a schedule, or nothing will get done. I am not so sure that I showered more than three times in the ten days of Snowmageddon, and I sure as heck didn’t clean the house. Dinners weren’t extra special gourmet affairs, even though they could have been; we had plenty of ingredients. I got no exercise except for the driveway.
When I am working, I am at the gym three times a week before Little T even wakes up. On the days that I am not at the gym, I am hanging out with my yoga friend, Rodney Yee and his DVD. Dinner is promptly served between 6:30 and 6:45, and the house is kept clean. Papers are graded in a timely manner, and lesson plans are complete.
So here’s my question: How is it that I can be so productive when I am super busy, and such a slug when I have nothing to do? Is this malady particular to me, or do any of you share in the disease?
We moms are so hard on ourselves! I hear you say "I wish that I could be happy focusing all of my attention on my family and home. Maybe I am selfish." And I often ask myself if I'm lazy or lame because I so wanted to stay home. We always feel some guilt - no matter which way we lean!
ReplyDeleteBottom line: Every mom is her best self when she's happy and fulfilled - and that formula is different for every person.
But to answer your question, I think I might be kind of the opposite. When I have WAY too many things on my plate, I get overwhelmed and something is left undone. As was the way when I was a teacher and a mom. I didn't give a rat's ass about my students, and I wasn't doing anyone any favors only focusing on my own family. :) I do thrive off some last minute energy with a to-do list for a party or an occasional busy day, but all in all, I like to focus on as few things as possible. I think I'm weird like that though.
Okay now that I've written a novel, welcome to blogging. I'll have to head back and read some prior entries now. I love it as a journal and outlet, and I think you will too!
-Katie
I empathize with you. My week was nearly the same. I did force myself to do at least one meaningful task a day, such as a load of laundry, or vacuuming the floor. I also shoveled the driveway to get in some much needed exercise.
ReplyDeleteI enjoy the first few weeks of summer vacation, having nothing to do and being able to do a variety of things, but after that it gets old. I find myself looking forward to schedules and routine.
Everybody is different, and I do believe that most "stay at home moms" get out of the house with their children (see "happy moms at the park above"). There is a reason it is called "Cabin Fever." My child went to "school" on Friday, I went to the gym and got a mani/pedi :)
Even one of the best SAHM's I know thrives on routine, and as her children reached pre-school age (3) they were out and about.
Routine is about scheduling, and if you don't schedule events, they don't get done, no matter what your career :)